CHALLENGING STEPS

THIS WEEK
Since New Year's Eve is your last night as a single woman (at least for the next year) make plans to attend an amazing bash.

Week 2
There's only 2 weeks left, so respond positively to every guy who contacts you - you never know!
RESULTS: I had 14 emails this week. 5 emails didn't have photos, so I didn't respond - doesn't feel safe. I did respond to 9 emails and am still in contact with 4.  I lost contact with the other guys because either they didn't email me again, their next email was too weird or I thought they were too young or old for it to play things out.

Week 4
Talk with 3 women who got married over the age of 40 and find out how they met their husbands.
RESULTS: MaryLouise married when she was 45. She met her husband on a blind date set up by mutual friends.  Beverly married at age 49 and met her husband at a workshop she was teaching. Cassandra was 51 (but lied and told him she was 49 - he married her anyway). They met online through Eharmony.

Week 5
Use your business contacts to find an event where there will be lots of men.
RESULTS: I went to a corporate event - it was a fundraiser for a community center.  High price tickets, etc. Met a lot of nice women and married men.  Need I say more.

Week 6
After your round of speed dating rejection, ask three of your friends to remind you of a few of your great qualities.
Kristie: Here's a few: You're outgoing, easy to talk to, and have an uplifting spirit!

Elizabeth: You are one of those rare people who truly listen, you don't waiver in your faith and you're a focused person, someone who doesn't indulge in excuses but sets out to do what needs to be done.

Tanya: You have to know that any guy would extremely lucky to have you! Your sense of adventure alone is a wonderful quality, but also your relationship with God and how you allow Him to lead you in life.

You guys are awesome.  Thanks (and the check is in the mail)!

Week 7
Go shopping in the men’s department, and ask a stranger for help with shopping for your relative.

RESULTS: I went to this golf store and  there were a number of men who looked like they were in shopping heaven. One nice guy gave me ideas on the perfect Christmas gift for my brother. It was good practice striking up a conversation with a stranger.

Week 8
Spend one day smiling at everyone you encounter!

RESULTS: My cheeks began to hurt after a while, and I know some people thought I was crazy, but overall it was fun. One place I went was Pep Boys where there were tons of men. It was good practice and even lifted my spirits in the process. If you look close that's me out front with frozen cheeks.

WEEK 9
Be still...

RESULTS: Being still is about a state of mind. I'm not good at stillness with my mind or body, so this was hard work and I failed many days.

WEEK 12
Take the initiative and ask a guy out for coffee.
RESULTS: I actually was able to accomplish this.  The guy didn't seem to into me. I'd be surprised if he called. I'd say, yes, because he seemed interesting, but a bit aloof.  I think what I liked more was that I was able to accomplish my goal. It felt good, even on a small level

WEEK 13
Visit with barber shops to see if they can offer some assistance!
RESULTS: I visited 2 barber shops, 1 in NJ and 1 in NYC and asked if I could come back and interview a few customers about love. They both agreed to let me come.

WEEK 14
Pray for a miracle and go for a Hail, Mary pass.
RESULTS: If a miracle happened, it remains unseen.  Perhaps I'll look back at this week as instrumental in meeting him.  But for now, I'll just say, any potential "him"s that crossed my path went unnoticed by me.

WEEK 16
Back to online profiles - try and get to know at least two guys via the telephone.
RESULTS: I gave my number out to 1 guy, but never heard from him.  Slow week.

WEEK 17
Take a short break and spend much needed time with family..
RESULTS: Had a blast with my sister, niece and the Amish. Aside from the cows and horse-drawn carriages, here was one of the treasures I found.  The caption on this t-shirt read "waiting for the perfect man." 

WEEK 19
Take a break from finding men online and see if my married, mom friends will do it for me.  In exchange, I'll have to take over their online duties for one-hour each night.  Do I have what it takes to me an online wife and mother.

RESULTS: I loved having a break from online dating, and had fun with my duties as wife and mother. But my friends weren't able to find a date for me. At least they spent some time in my shoes, which was a really nice thing for them to do.

WEEK 21
Try finding him at a Community Event.

RESULTS: I was the wrong age.  Had I only been 20 years older, it might have been a successful evening!  I went to a fundraiser for a museum, that was being held at a winery. 

WEEK 23
Attend a church outing--hopefully one where there are single men over the age of 40.  Hmmm?  This won't be easy.

RESULTS: Perhaps another time at another location. I met a lot of great people, men and women, but the women outnumber the men 4 to 1 (which is often the case at church outings). Nor did I meet a any potential "hims".  At least I had a good time.
 

Week 24
Go to a bookstore and try to meet men.  You rated it pretty high on my poll. It was in 3rd place with 22% of the votes.

RESULTS: I always like a good trip to the Barnes & Nobles.  Unfortunately, I didn't meet anyone. It was a quiet evening with not a lot of people around, which is unusual for the store, but I guess has become typical for my outings :-(
 

Week 25
Go to a sporting event and surround yourself with sweaty men.

RESULTS: Bowling wasn't my first church, but so few manly sporting this happen in the summer - or at lease ones where men and women have the opportunity to be social - especially when you plan at the last minute. I men some men, but none that led to more than cordial conversation.
 

Week 26
I don't like going to bars, so I've avoided them, but this week I'll pay a visit to one and see what happens. You never know.

RESULTS: I went, but didn't conquer.  Met no single men. It seemed to be a place for couples. I guess I have to pick better next time.
 

Week 27
Bake cookies for the local fire department or police department (with ulterior motives, of course).
RESULTS: I  went to the local fire department and brought some sweet treats.  No they weren't homemade, but I think the bakery did a much better job than I could. It was a slow day for them, so it was nice getting to know them.  No potentials, but nice practice and it felt good doing something for service personal - they were actually volunteer firefighters.

Week 28
When looking for dates online, avoid looking at their photos as my first impression and focus on their profile.
RESULTS: I never thought of myself as someone who focused too much on looks in the first place, but I was surprised at how wrong I was.  I would read profiles and think "this guy sounds cool" and then remove the paper that I had covering their photo and decide, "I think I'll pass."  Could a girl get more superficial?  Although half of the time I decided to pass, the other half, I sent an introduction email.  So I guess that makes me not half-bad!

Week 29
Spend some time with someone younger than me and help to build them up and be an encourager.
RESULTS: Saturday I spent the day with an 11 year-old. Together in Manhattan we explored the city and talked about boys, clothes, moms, making friends, and self-esteem. 

Week 30
Start now to make plans for your half-way mark which is only a few weeks away.
RESULTS: I have a several new challenges to help kick start the second half of the journey. Stay tuned. It should be fun.

Week 31
Check all of my online dating websites every day and initiate and respond more frequently. I've been a little lazy with this.
RESULTS: I started email exchanges with 3 new guys this week and I updated my Plenty of Fish profile to make it a little more interesting.

Week 32
This week I am going to work on my innerself.  I will fast, or consecrate for 3 days, avoiding evening television. With that time, I will pray for new direction as I get closer to my half way mark.
RESULTS: Some new opportunities presented themselves that were good but really distracting.  It got me off balance so the consecration allowed me to remind myself what's important to me and where my focus should be.

Week 33
This week I'm going to spread the love. I'll help a friend take a few steps to finding her soul mate. So many people have helped me, it's time to pay it forward.
RESULTS: I can't believe how lame I was with this challenge. It was a simple one, but I got too busy with work and life to help out a friend.  That's shows me that I definitely need to slow down.

Week 34
Currently, I am emailing back and forth with several men.  I'm discovering that the exchange can take weeks before he ever asks me out and sometimes it fizzles before then. So each time one of my email "buddies" has gone three rounds (back and forth 3 times), if he doesn't ask me out first, I'm going to suggest we meet for coffee.
Check out my blog BLOG on my annoying experience to see how the challenge came about!
RESULTS: This went surprisingly well. I have one definitely date for this week and another that may happen. With both guys I just said at the end of my email, "say let's meet."  I didn't hear from them right away, but I was okay with that.  Then, bam... They both said, "let's get together."  Yahoo. My dry spell is over!

Week 35
I never have much success with meeting men in every day establishments like Starbucks or the gym or Barnes & Nobles. This week I will start conversations and get the names of 3 men (people who work at these places won't count).
RESULTS: I got the name of 2 men (one at church and the other at a restaurant).  The 3rd, I learned his name, but it was said aloud by the people around him. Most importantly, I discovered being coy doesn't work. 

Week 36
This week I challenged myself to find a big social gathering to attend where there will be loads of men. But make sure it's an event that allows for one-on-one interaction. Have a conversation with at least 6 men.
Results: I went to this dinner gathering. I went to a similar events a couple of months ago. Then, there were about 30 people with half being the opposite gender.  Wouldn't you know it, this month, with it being one of my challenges, there was 25 people - 3 men and 2 of these brought their dates with them.  I had a good time, but I have to really do better in the challenge department!

Week 37
My challenge this week was to take a class at Home Depot on Saturday morning. No matter what they are teaching, try to have a great time and meet perhaps some great men in the process.
Results: I actually learned how to tile. I really did!  Freddie was a great teacher and I left feeling confident. Oh, and the guy part... I was the only person who signed up.  And Freddie was probably young enough to be my son. At least I learned a 2nd trade.
       

Week 38
See if I can meet a really great guy during my trip to Indiana this coming weekend. Plan ahead to arrange a date on Saturday. If you know of anyone who you think might be a good fit, let me know.
Results: I didn't set aside time before I left to meet guys in the area, so I thought I'd try to meet someone when I arrived. I was out until 4 AM  with my girlfriends on Friday night at various places.  We had fun, but I was so busy catching up with them, I wasn't very social with the guys. I learned my lesson.

Me and my girls out on the town!

Week 39
Send out 39 emails to see how many responses I will receive and hopefully generate some interest and meet some great guys.
Results:  6 guys who responded with positive emails. # of them I am currently corresponding with.

Week 40
Make plans for Friday night, so I'll have something to do if no dates materialize:  Results:  I went to a dinner/event with all women. I had a blast.

Pick 2 of the 4 dating websites and email at least 3 guys that I'm interested in. Results: I didn't do this at all. I'll certainly make up for it this week.

Name 3 admirable qualities I will bring with me to a marriage (thanks, Bret)! Results:  1) I can be pretty amazing in a crisis situation.  2) I'm loyal.  3) I'm daring.

Week 50
Give us a "snapshot" view of what your life together with your husband might look like in 5 years time (November 2013). ~Bret's Challenge

Results: I was thinking that we would be remodeling our house yet again. But laughing the whole way through because I talked my husband into making a room daring and bold and it turned out to be a mess.  We are both older and wiser concerning the realities of marriage. We have been doing some traveling the last few years because why put it off when you have someone great to travel with. I'm also hoping by now we have a common hobby or activity that we do on a regular basis that we enjoy.  And after 5 years we still are having our special date night once a week.

Take up a new coed activity like going to a golf range where you can practice your swing and ask a few guys for tips on your swing. ~Maureen's Challenge

Go to 3 new places this week where you might find single men. If no single men are there, wait or move on to the next place. You must have at least a short conversation with one single man in each place. ~Christine's Challenge